Featured Writer: Adelle Purdham
On creating space to write and writing advice.
Hello all,
Welcome to the 18th edition of Women Writing!
A week from today, I’ll be co-hosting a writing retreat in Muskoka with Dinah Laprairie. Dinah and I have been planning this getaway for many months, dreaming about a winter wonderland even in the sweltering summer temperatures. Our idea was simple. Get a group of women together to reinvigorate their writing by rekindling their creativity using all the senses. Yes, we’ll be writing—individually and collectively—and we’ll be discussing craft and publishing, but we’ll also be exploring our senses by getting into nature, enjoying good meals and discussions and just taking time for ourselves. We want to support women on their writing journey and this is one step towards that goal. You can learn more about our most recent retreat at Rekindle Creativity: Women’s Writing Retreat in Muskoka.
Every week I’m thrilled to share insights and writing practices from accomplished writers and this week is no exception. Enjoy!
About the author…
Adelle Purdham is an author, writing instructor, and parent disability advocate based in Nogojiwanong/Peterborough, Ontario. She holds an MFA in Creative Nonfiction Writing from the University of King’s College and is a qualified French teacher. Her memoir-in-essays, I DON’T DO DISABILITY AND OTHER LIES I’VE TOLD MYSELF, is forthcoming with Dundurn Press in November 2024. Her prose and poetry appear in literary anthologies (GOOD MOM ON PAPER, Book*hug Press), literary journals (THE HUMBER LITERARY REVIEW), newspapers (THE TORONTO STAR), magazines (3.21: CANADA’S DOWN SYNDROME MAGAZINE) and online (BREVITY’S NONFICTION BLOG). Adelle’s essays are finalists in several literary contests, including: The Writer’s Union of Canada’s Short Prose Competition, EVENT MAGAZINE and THE FIDDLEHEAD’S 2022 Creative Nonfiction Contests. Adelle is founder of The Write Retreat and a Course Instructor at Trent University—Durham. www.adellepurdham.ca
“You and your words matter, and so do the stories you have to tell. You are worthy of the time it takes to make your art.”
On a writing routine …
My routines and writing schedule changes depending on my current needs, often on a seasonal basis. At times teaching or other responsibilities take priority; or even various stages of the writing process will hold my focus (e.g. writing new material, finishing a draft, submitting to publishers, editing) When it comes to experimenting and new writing, a task where no one else is depending on me to produce something, I have to be more self-disciplined. When I schedule creative time into my week, I’m much more likely to respect and protect that time slot from other intrusions. I prefer to write in the morning, when my synapses are crackling, and I have the whole day ahead of me. But as a mom of three, I’ve learned to be flexible. I’m currently writing this in the late afternoon, sitting beside one of my daughters who’s receiving a two-hour medical infusion. When my babies were babies, I would squirrel away in cafes, or the public library, and I’ve extended those hours into entire days over the years, and aim for a week or longer residency away a few times a year to write. This is of course only possible with the support of my partner. The only real routine I have when it comes to completing the work is to begin—no time to waste.
On writing spaces …
Since we moved homes almost two years ago, I’ve graduated from primarily writing at the kitchen table to my own tiny office. To get to my tiny office, I walk through my youngest daughter’s bedroom. Admittedly—I’m writing in a closet. But can I sell it for you? The closet has one large rectangular window that overlooks the street, and there I sit on my comfy chair looking out at my neighbourhood and the mature trees and the vast, open, sky. The room-inside-a-room is especially quiet, not such a bad spot for a writer. Normally, when the door’s closed, the girls know to respect my workspace solemnity. Once, while completing a writing residency during my MFA I put a STOP sign up on my tiny office door so that my daughter would know not to interrupt over the weekend. She knocked anyway until I relented, “What is it?” “I know I’m not supposed to knock, but what does the sign say?” My tiny office walls are hugged by bookshelves filled with favourites, latest reads, craft books and other inspiration, and on the walls are my poems-in-progress, an idea adopted from Ian Williams to allow for the occasional tinker with wording. For the past three years, I’ve listened to Vivaldi’s The Four Seasons as I’m writing. Recently, I’ve added in Yo-Yo Ma. Classical music serves as background noise, and I can fall into the work.
On writing communities …
I am part of The Writer’s Union of Canada (TWUC) and The Creative Nonfiction Collective (CNFC), and both groups have been a support to me in numerous ways. With TWUC, I have received micro grants to mentor other writers, which has helped to nourish and foster my career as a writer and writing instructor. I’ve also been given the funded opportunity to speak in numerous schools as part of the Writer-in-the-School program. Both organizations also offer the opportunity to give public readings, which I’ve gladly taken part in. I have twice been a finalist in The Creative Nonfiction Collective’s CNF contest, which gave a nice boost to my credibility as a writer, and likely helped me land my first book deal. I have the privilege of being a contest reader for the CNFC’s CNF contest this year—a chance to give back and gain a new experience to add to my resume.
On challenges …
When I read this question, I guffawed. I spit my tea. Yes! The names of the challenges I face are Ariel, Elyse and Penelope—joking, joking (kind of). My children are the source of prolific creative inspiration: I write about motherhood, disability parenting, and being a woman in the world (which, for me, has involved navigating expectations around domestic responsibility and child care). One of the challenges has certainly been around how others see me. When my babies were small, I was viewed as a mother and only as a mother. I felt flattened, like I could only hold one identity in the eyes of society, and that identity had to be mother. My creative self battled for the time and space to write. I create a whole retreat to do just that for other women, because of the struggles I faced.
I would like to add, the only way that it truly became possible for me to write was with the support (emotional, financial and otherwise) of my husband; and my own wherewithal to hold him to the support he promised me would come when I was ready to launch myself back into a career. His belief in me has allowed me to flourish.
On the best writing advice …
Focus on the writing and do the editing later. Get the words down on the page, and while I don’t believe in zero judgement during that process, I would advocate for a very low level of self-censorship in the moment (and substantial revisions later). I love Thoreau’s advice to “Know your own bone”; I think it’s important to get to know ourselves as writers and how we work and think best, and lean into those practices with a gut-lead approach.
I remind myself it’s okay to fail.
On the worst writing advice …
The worst writing advice I’ve heard is usually from non-writers with an opinion about writing that isn’t earned or hard won. I’m talking about the know-it-all Aunt Anitas, the Meddling Mikes, or Next-Door Neighbour Critic (though my current neighbours are lovely people). While this isn’t advice, per se, a neighbour once asked me if it was my husband who wrote the piece I had just published.
“No,” I was adamant.
“But he helped you then?”
Do not listen to these unhelpful comments.
Writing advice that isn’t necessarily terrible can feel terrible coming at the wrong time. “You can always self-publish if it doesn’t work out,” a friend said innocently while I was very early in the process of writing my first book, which was enough to plant a seed of worry in my writer psyche and make me question my worth. I had my mind set on different goals. I needed the friend and others to believe in my goals alongside me. Any advice is bad advice that doesn’t serve you and/or doesn’t sit right in your chest.
On advice from personal experiences …
Don’t ever let anyone else tell you what you can or cannot write about; or let them make you believe that you have nothing to say, or that what you do have to say isn’t important. You and your words matter, and so do the stories you have to tell. You are worthy of the time it takes to make your art. If writing is important to you, make sure others know it, but don’t be surprised if they don’t fully understand your affinity. Read, support, amplify and uplift other women writers you admire. If you can find just one other writer to keep yourself accountable—an accountability buddy for weekly check ins—do it! This is one of my most beloved and cherished writing practices.
Adelle’s online spaces …
Please visit me online, check out my blog and sign up for my free author newsletter at: https://adellepurdham.ca/
You can also find my writer page on Facebook and I’d love to connect with you on Instagram: @adellepurdham
“I help women overcome their doubts and fear to write the novel they’ve been dreaming about.”
As an Author Accelerator Book Coach I work with writers at all stages of the writing journey, from the initial seed of an idea to pitching agents. If you have a story idea you’d like to pursue this year, or you have a manuscript-in-progress that you can’t seem to move forward, get in touch with me. Let’s talk about what’s holding you back. Visit me at liisakovalabookcoach.com to learn about my 1:1 and group book coaching services or to book a free 30-minute coaching call.
Are you a teacher who loves to write?
So am I! Sign up for my 12-week group book coaching sessions designed especially for teachers who want to write. This experience starts in April and will help you get your novel idea ready for prime writing season this summer.
This group coaching experience is perfect for you if you:
Need guidance to get started
Have a book idea that you’re passionate about
Want to write a novel or memoir
Are open to learning and growing as a writer
Are looking for a supportive and fun community of like-minded writers
What to expect:
This is not your typical online course or writing workshop. This is a hands-on, interactive, and personalized coaching program that will help you:
Clarify your book idea and goals
Develop your ideas and hone in on your point
Participate in craft exercises and discussion
Create a plan to move your project forward
Get honest and compassionate feedback from me and your peers
Stay motivated and accountable to your deadlines
Find the joy in your writing practice
How to apply:
Interested? Send me an email an liisabookcoach@gmail.com and put “Teacher” in the subject line. I’ll send you the details. You have all the skills you need to learn how to write that book already!
Happy writing!
Women Writing is a weekly newsletter featuring women who are doing the difficult work of writing. If you enjoyed reading the newsletter, please share it with a fellow writer. Let’s inspire each other!
Great piece! It's always interesting reading about the lives of other writers.